Okay, this is it! I can feel it! Randy Z, Randy the Zuck - it just feels right! But hey! Don’t call me a Zuckhead or a Motherzucker, okay? All I need now is my BIG IDEA, but it’s coming… I know… I can feel it.

Hey! One more time! James Brown at the TAMI show in 1964. You owe it to yourself!

All of a sudden it hit me… music is, like, so YESTERDAY - DUH!!! I mean, when I was young, the cool people from a cultural point of view were all musicians. I mean nobody was cooler than Mick Jagger, John Lennon, Bob Dylan or JAMES BROWN!!! (if you’ve never seen James Brown in the TAMI show, immediately stop whatever you’re doing and go to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2nybY647F0) These people spoke to their culture and their culture listened - and cared. Who speaks to people in the music business these days - Justin Beaver! Is anybody listening? I don’t think so. So I thought some more and tried to figure out who does speak to their culture these days and it hit me - KABOOM! Computer geeks! I mean who could possibly be cooler than Steve Jobs!. Okay, he’s no James Dean, but how much cooler does it get than dying when you’re absolutely on top. We’re talking Jesus Jobs here! But think about it, when I was young everybody wanted to come to San Francisco to get laid and wear flowers in their hair. Now everyone want to come to San Francisco to get laid and GET RICH! And I’m stuck in LA. But I can change that - just like I can change my name. MC Cocky Ran-!D! is history - from now on it’s RANDY ZUCKERBERG!

EUREKA!

(Tan Ran-?D?)

I don’t know. I mean, it seems like I HAVE to do something, but people kept saying I looked like the FUCKING TAN MOM! I mean, c’mon… is that fair? …I don’t know.